Destiny Profiling

Let Go Of People Pleasing

Feng shui Serenity Blog People Pleasing Let Go

You have a beautiful weekend away planned. On Friday afternoon, your sister called, she launched straight into her drama of ‘breaking up with her boyfriend’ and would love to come over and stay for the weekend. You, although have been looking forward to this holiday for the last few weeks, caved in and re-scheduled everything so you can be a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear you can offer, as a perfect and kind sister you are. Yet, secretly, you felt so drained and don’t know how long you can continue to do this any longer…

Does that sound like you?

As an empath and highly sensitive person, for most of my life, I lived as a perfectionist for others. I feel other’s feelings and pains. And I thought it was easier to just say yes to those small demands on my time and energy so they can feel better. The problem is that those small things have a tendency to add up. And of course I didn’t know that I can’t heal others until they are ready to heal themselves.

So as a ‘recently-retired’ nice girl / daughter / wife / friend / business partner, I newly introduce a power word “NO” in my vocabulary. I learn to put myself first without feeling the guilt.

Letting Go People Pleasing

For most of us, especially if you are an empathy, sensitives, who want to bring peace and love into our lives, People Pleasing can be an easy trap to fall into. It plays out in subtle ways. For some of you, it can play out on high levels.

People-pleasing is when you make another person more comfortable at the expense of your own discomfort. It is an act of trying to ease the state of desires, needs of another, at your own expense. 

We people please because we want to be a ‘good person’, a loving friend, to not get people upset. We are quick to sooth the situation, swallow our own hurts and inconvenience. For some of us, people please can trace back to childhood trauma in order to keep the peace, that is survival. That is protecting yourself from further trauma.

There is a big difference between the problem ‘people-please’ and ‘give and take’. The problem is when it is starting to cost you. People pleasing is when you over-ride your own instinct, you start to find the mind, words are saying yes, when really your body and energy want to say no. And once you have pleased people a few times, they will keep trying it. And you don’t know how to get out of it.

What I want to ask you firstly, without any shame or judgement, is to identify any parts of your life you have caught yourself in People-Pleasing. Be that certain relationship, be that certain action you didn’t take.  Let it filter up to the surface so you can exam it.

People Pleasing erodes your own feeling, your own fire, your own light. It is because you are soothing the moment without understanding the greater map. The person that you are soothing in that moment may not be learning from the exchange, because you are not being honest with them. 

When we approach situations this way, something happens energetically. With this comes with the loss of attachment to the natural flow of connection of self and others. Our life force cease to expand to its full potential. People pleasing in fact is a very dishonest way energetically operating.

Feng Shui Serenity Letting Go Challenge

The gift of this time is it is getting harder and harder to hurt yourself this way. It is the time not only forces us to get in touch with our centred feelings but also elevate our energetic awareness. For you are becoming more finely tuned to how you feel and what you need.

If you sense someone is timid in your presence, do you have the ability to bring your energy down a little to meet theirs?  The beauty of when you stop being a People Pleaser, you become very good at who you will mould to and who you will not.

Letting go of the “People Pleasing” does not mean you no longer have compassion towards others or continue to be a loving force on the planet. On the contrary, you will only be able to open to more intimate and deep connections when you are able to set healthy boundaries.

Stop being a People Pleaser does not always result in relationship ending either. Sometimes, some of you may have to have an ‘edgy moment’ with someone who is very genuine in order to reset the relationship slightly.

Start to recognise the people and events that hurt you when you give you love their direction, or sth feels off/ unsteady inside of you.

First notice those people, then it is time to identify the worst chronic relationship patterns for this syndrome – you are the giver, while the other is the taker.

Step away from them for a period , so you can recover your own life force to see what is your loving energy can do if it is freed from those relationships you are caught in.

We are here at the tipping point on Earth where people are remembering their soul and start to feel the essence of their soul. And it is an uneasy point where all it is fear-based rising to those who are already awake, while others are playing out in full density.

But what is for sure is, the time of People Pleasing is OVER. 

You have the power to say No and it is very easy and simple to do, but what makes it more complicated is how different you feel inside when you start doing it. Your heart may feel a bit unsettled, a bit nervous how others may react.

An here is the key – You have everything inside of you that you ever need, and you are ready.

You are ready to let things be a little uncomfortable for you have let them be in the past. For this is the next stage of you growth, evolution and power – not power over others but power inside of you to be who you came here to be.

If you continue to lean in others’ energy field, that lean not only takes off your own balance point. you are giving them an excuse of repeating the pattern over and over again.

When we are trying to change a pattern, we need to break a pattern and do things a different way. Feeling uncomfortable at first is very normal.

This is your life, this the life you need for yourself. it is the life you are ready to embrace and the energy you will   draw back from people please will be huge and will cultivate a New life force will develop new connections for you Maybe first a little grief.

I wish you love this path you are on.

Grace Xo

Your Soul Speaks

This is the photo I took at Sydney time 5.36am this morning (Saturday 28th July) when the full moon lunar eclipse was happening.


The darkness of the sky
The brightness of the star
This is the path opener, the portal.
It is time to release and
awaken the things that are sleeping
in order to see and understand
what lives deep within us

Tune into the inner temple of your heart
Stay grounded
But dive deep
Hold onto Mother Earth
You are supported this month by the double Earth energy
Surrender to the sweet water within

It is only through the process of remembering who you are
you will remember What you are here to do…

So this is the gift I want to give it to you this month during this Karmic cosmic event, to know where, within your home that you can drench yourself into the stillness and listen to your soul speaks.

Meditation is a process of purification.
It strips off all the distractions from the external world and able to stay connected with the essence of you – the purest, highest self of yours. It is the process of connecting with soul.


Grace Xo

The Power of Inner Feng Shui

Feng Shui Serenity Inner Feng Shui

2017 saw many of us feeling the strong metal energy at works. This potent Rooster energy brought many issues, events, old wounds to the surface, and are certainly shaking up many established orders at hand in order to relocate us in a place that ‘we are meant to be’.

In 2018, We are being asked to cultivate our ability to see beyond the surface and tune inward to embody our true essence under this influence.  As the collective energy is rising, more people are honouring this energy and being awakened to align their cosmic blueprint and their soul purpose.

For me, it couldn’t bring me more joy knowing that many of my clients start to be aware of the power of ‘Inner Feng Shui’ in addition to the traditional service. It also serves a constant reminder for myself to make solid commitment in order to keep my own vibrations raised.

Inner Feng Shui is hardly a new concept in Chinese metaphysics. 風水是人, meaning Feng Shui is people. Its core fundamental is – it all comes from within.  心生万法.

Inner Feng Shui is about who we are as an energetic being. It is associated with our man-luck, the Karma and it plays an important role in our ultimate destiny. It is the words we speak and action we take. It is our heart that holds the dream and our soul that speaks the truth.

We live in a world that glorifies “doing is achieving”, “there is not enough to go around”, and “you have to work hard and fight to be successful”. We are so engrossed in doing against time and we forget living. We ignore our bodies, our deepest desires and our inner voices. We are forever pushing forward like a martyr thinking we are one step closer to the life we dream of, yet the more we do, the to-do-list appear to be longer…..the FOMO (fear of missing out) is pushing us into the battle we are doom to lose against time.

“Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.”
Lao Tzu

Like the ancient forests, spectacular galaxies, there is a natural intelligence and power that is beyond logic and reason. It resides within each one of us, we need to attend to our ‘inner garden’ in order to be connected with the higher source, it is the getaway to access the infinite wisdom and power.

Inner Feng Shui Feng Shui SerenityWhen we focus on our Inner Feng Shui, we focus on connecting with our inner body, rather than being dictated by what is going on in the external world, we are anchored in the Now.

The more consciousness we direct into the inner body, the higher its vibrational frequency becomes, much like a light that grows brighter as you turn up the dimmer switch to increase the flow of electricity. At this higher energy level, negativity can not affect you anymore, and you tend to attract new circumstances that reflect this higher frequency.

Your inner body is also timeless. While our outer body appears to grow old and wither, the energy field of you inner body will feel just the same when you are eighty. It will be just as vibrantly alive. When you are truely connect with your inner body, your physical body will feel lighter, clearer and more alive. As there is more consciousness in the body. You are literally slowing down the ageing process.

When we focus on our Inner Feng Shui, aligning the energy with our true purpose, we no longer bother to compare with others, because we know we are all shining our unique light.  We no longer see others as competitors, because we are all ONE.

We start to understand that success is no longer defined by the dollar value or social status. It is the feeling in your heart that you are in a flow.

When we focus on our Inner Feng Shui, we can relax into the knowing that there is no time limit for us to become the person we were born to be, the only moment truely exist is NOW.

This is the journey it is.

This is the journey that is unfolding for you.

Follow your own path

Be your own inner artist.

Move with the directive flow of you own being.


Grace Xo

December Monthly Energy Update – Deep Reflection

Embodiment of wisdom

Venture inward

 Discover a deep truth 

Heightened emotions

Revelations and sychronicities


December Energetic Theme


The Yang Water Rat (壬子) month starts from 7th December. It is symbolised by two elements: Yang Water on top of Yang Water Rat. With the support of the Metal energy from the Rooster 酉 Year, December brings us deeper into the Water season in the elementary sense.

The energy of Water is inward and descending, just like the nature of water is to run deep. This is the season of winter: the time to slow down, retreat when the energy is most Yin. This is the time for deep reflection.

The Yang Water 壬 is  the embodiment of wisdom. This energy supports us to venture inward, explore our inner realms and discover some raw and insightful truth. It is time to release those burdens we have been carrying that are not ours, instead, we are invited to open up to the new opportunities and vision. December’s energy helps us to expand our vision of what we want to create for our future.

Water is also associated with heightened emotions. We can expect an increased sensitivity on many levels. The Water energy also gifts us with the most vivid imagination and highest guidance and insights. It is the perfect time for self healing and self-mastery.

Many of us will feel this strong current of Yang Water, there will be times that we are confused with fiction or truth. In order not to get swept up with the tides of misinformation, we are asked to be deeply rooted and anchored. In order to rise up, we need to ground into our own energy field and listen deeply to our inner voice.

Be still, be at peace with silence and tune into your heart. Allow the distraction of the world fall away so you can tune into your own inner guidance.

Stay centred during the holiday season.  Bring the light to what needs to be revealed, initiate your desires and changes with clarity.

Because 2018 is going to be a year of manifestation and actions.



There is a thunderstorm building within you or around you that is causing your roots to quake. It might be a storm of building emotions, threatening to erupt or already exploring beyond your control. You may find it confronting. Or it might be pressure from your own minds, creating unnecessary burden, such as fears or self-doubt.

Don’t fear it. After all, storm is just nature’s way of gathering energy together that needs to be release.  Instead, get excited! With a release of tension, relief and freedom soon follow, often with a fresh perspective and perhaps the gift of a promising vision of your future.

The focus are likely to be around your residence, property decisions, your mother or other close relatives as well as your health.


December is a month of Personal Power for the Fire people. You will feel incredibly centred and powerful this month. Breathe into the depths of your belly, you move with more rhythm and strength.

When we ignite the power of our inner fire, we feel courageous, confident in the direction of our future goals.

Align your vision and activate your desires. 2018 is a year of manifestation!

December is also a great month for  ladies if you are looking for romantic connections.


Money continues to be the key theme for the Earth people this month. The difference is that you have gained so much clarity on how to create your own abundance in your life. Your material needs are provided as you follow your intuition and manifest your dreams into reality. Open your arms to receive it!

Some of the treasure will come in the forms of brilliant ideas, and some will come as opportunities. Release any of your worries to the divine light, knowing that you are supported.

Embrace abundance and welcome in money. Use it consciously and be generous with yourself and others.


The  strong Water energy in December will bring heightened emotions as well as wisdoms to the Metal people.

The seamless interchange between the two Water elements will bring  an enormous amount of information in order to cleanse your perceptions and open up to a new vision of the future.

There will be high level of insights being downloaded, revelations, synchronicities and incoming communications. It can be powerful beyond measure, at the same time, can also feel overwhelming.

Trust in the process and be open to release the old patterns and blockages.


It is important for the Water people to stay grounded in December as you might be feeling things are slipping out of your grip at some point.  The strong Water energy represents resistance, competitive forces as well as obstacles.

You can find strength within you to move through any obstacle that stands in your way towards your soul’s path.

The best way to stay anchored and not to be swept away is to take a step back from the life situation and connect with the ever present nature. Feel the peace, innocence and love above all.

Simply be.

Grace Xo

Feng Shui Serenity Sign Up page

Activate Your Abundance via Wealth Element (PART II.)

In Part I of the “Activate Your Abundance” series, I have explained how to find your Wealth Element. If you have missed this, catch up on it HERE.

In the world of Chinese metaphysics, one of the most profound theories is that of Yin & Yang. Most people are familiar with it. The key concept is this:

Yang contains the seed of Yin and Yin contains the seed of Yang. Yin and Yang are considered interdependent, complementary and exist in a state of dynamic tension.

It is often represented by the picture of a Tai Chi diagram where black is Yin and white is Yang. If you would like to know more, head HERE.

Wealth energy is associated with the Yang energy in nature. However, when the Yin energy, which is feminine energy in nature, is honoured and nurtured, wealth luck is being generated. This is because Yang is born in Yin.

When we are calm, grounded and happy in every moment in our life – feminine energy, we provide a solid foundation for the Yang energy (carrying wealth) to be generated. This theory proves that you don’t need to fight in order to receive abundance. If you look after your feminine side and stay authentic, true to yourself and your creativity, wealth and money will find you.

Joy, happiness and feeling in your element are type of energy that is calm and gentle,  it is not pushy or aggressive, and is expansive in its own understated divine.

When people pursue their passion with dedication, they feel fulfilment in life and in most cases money falls into their lap without any specific effort of chasing it. Wealth is simply a by-product.

Understanding this on an energetic level can profoundly affect your attitude and thinking pattern towards wealth.

Feng shui Serenity Activate your abundance and wealth

Spot your Wealth Element in your LUCK PILLAR seals the golden opportunity to create abundance.  

Timing, in our destiny, holds a special place. Creating abundance involves an ability to be at the place at the right time.

When your personal Wealth Element appears in your 10-year or 5-year luck pillar, it signals that changes or opportunities are emerging. Knowing exact the meaning behind it is crucial so you don’t miss any golden opportunities to make money, at the same time, it can also save you from hasty investment disaster.

Below is the luck pillar for a person whose Self Element is Yin Wood.  Her Wealth Element therefore is Earth. We can see that during the 32-41 10-year luck pillar, she is being influenced by the Yang Earth element. This energy in particular relates to her Direct Wealth. Direct wealth represents salary, regular income or any wealth that is predicable or through an conventional source. This indicates that , during this period,  her career will be in focus. Depends on the other elements in her chart, the interpretation can be different whether it is positive or challenging.

Feng Shui serenity Four Pillar of Destiny Chart luck cycles

As she enters her5-year luck pillar 42-46, the influencing energy will be shifting to an Yin Earth energy. This energy relates to her Indirect Wealth. Indirect Wealth represents wealth that is unexpected or out of her control, such as bonuses, dividend, investment gain or stocks profits etc. It can also indicates windfall through unconventional source, such as lotto or inheritance.

This is the most obvious way to identify your Wealth Element in your luck pillar.

In Part III, I will be talking about the importance of reading your Destiny chart in Totality rather than ‘counting the number of the element’ or simply reading from the surface level.   Your Wealth Element in your Destiny birth chart can be hidden but is a driving force for your wealth creation.

Stay tuned!

Activate Your Abundance via Wealth Element (PART I.)

Through the sands of time, the cycle of life is infinite. It is forever changing, moving… Nothing stays the same.

However, I would like to remind you that affluence, unboundedness and abundance are part of our underlying natural state, it is always there for us to access.

The beauty of the FIVE ELEMENTS THEORY is that it teaches us that Nature’s intelligence unfolds spontaneously through the path of least effort, enabling us to access this abundance — which is the way we should live our lives.

The minute we were born, the universe gifted each one of us a fountain of ABUNDANCE. It resides deeply within us; we just need to re-remember the secret password. 

It is the key to unlocking the abundance in your life.

Your Destiny chart not only reveals this code but also the path that leads to your abundance. Each of us has a special element that represents your abundance, based on our date of birth.  In the Four Pillars of Destiny, we call it “the wealth element”.


If your Self Element is WATER, your Wealth Element is FIRE

If your Self Element is WOOD, your Wealth Element is EARTH

If your Self Element is FIRE, your Wealth Element is METAL

If your Self Element is EARTH, your Wealth Element is WATER

If your Self Element is METAL, your Wealth Element is WOOD

Now you know exactly what your Wealth Element is. Revisit your Destiny Chart to discover if you have any wealth elements in your chart, where are they located in the chart? Are they in your 10-year luck pillars? Don’t panic if you can’t find any wealth elements in your birth chart, it does not mean you are doomed. 

In Part II, I will explain how knowing the Wealth Element in your Destiny chart is the key to unlock your abundance. Click HERE for Part II. 

If you don’t know what your self-element is, you can get your FREE Four Pillars of Destiny chart HERE.

If you have requested the birth chart in the past from me before, please make sure you check your junk folder before you request again. Mark “” as ‘not junk’.

Grace Xo